sigh. super duper tired ....seems like my battery has worn out again after the trip to taipei.was t
:(quite fast huh...worse dylan has developed a new style of being made to sleep during my absence..* shrug* shall not talk about it.was tearing last night cause milk supply dwindling then dylan was so difficult ( or maybe i am just tired).he kept calling shouting or maybe screaming on the bed as if to beckon somebody to carry him. but both maid and i were afraid to carry him cause he din look tired, else it will take a longer time for him to sleep, i know sometimes baby just wanna be picked up and hugged, but i know dylan, he wants to be carried FOR A LONG TIME!!! and we cant make it a habit.however,in the end i gave up , pick him up , did the whole mumbo jumbo on top of his protests and forced him to sleep. it is so amazing why he refuses to sleep when he starts yawning when being carried. It is obvious that he is tired. i think my baby does not know to relax, and his stupid mother also dunno how to make him relax. think i am a bad horrible mom.:( but then i have already tried! i patted him , shhh him to calm him , only works sometimes. i feel so guilty to make him cry before he sleep cause he surely protest. poor baby, then he sometimes will sulk, or sob in his sleep. oh well, let me think of it this way, he will outgrow it....cant wait for 5 months. lol...then i will have new sets of prob coming in on top the fun i have with him.

but this morning was sweet. he woke up at 5.30am, and started to smile at me. i was lying down beside him in the semi darkness. and stroking his cheeks, and he smiled even more. :) you just feel so happy when his eyes interlock with yours.