okie ....let's face it.. we all grow old some day. Seems that it finally dawn upon me that i am promoted.Not that i look like a mother now, ( hehe, i still get compliments saying i dont look like i have given birth) but..... mentally, i know , i have to give up some choices and desires of mine. and i have to stay put at home, i want to be there for Dylan, for each and every milestone till he enters nursery, at least.....

After feeding him at 1. 30 am last night, i couldnt sleep. I was thinking about what i read on xiaxue's blog on Girl on Girl and thinking about the producer of Munkysuperstar , Gillian, whom have met with Tracey regarding the casting of An eye for guy... i actually had met Gillian to be auditioned and was supposed to audition....but i went to Tokyo for Holiday. in the end they casted Denise Keller( of course i cant compare w her la) ...:)

and then my thoughts went to another audition which Mark's wife, owner of Eclectic Attic who had asked me to go.....i remembered i went to TCS, and was handed a script to practise for the character of APPLE....turns out that it was the film which Lydia Sum acted in and Apple was her daughter...they prolly din choose me cause i was too skinny.... How can Lydia Sum have a skinny daughter?....

and then i thought about the director of Play music James, which came to RGPS cause one artiste came to the school to perform. He spotted me and asked me for an audition( yet again) ...well you know me, i cant sing chinese songs for nuts... and i believe that the company would not want to spend too much money to groom a totally new artiste. but now how.. i am mother liao leh..

and yet again , when i went to Tokyo,( like 5 years ago) my friend in Universal Music , Gaku, was bent on bringing me into the music scene, brought me to see quite a number of music houses, one of which was ROJAM.. i think they did BOA. but then again, why would they want someone who cant speak japanese....well anyway , i did make some good friends like Ward.

Well bottom line is , i am quite sick of it, i think fate and luck has it, you must be thick skin to sell your talents, and lady luck must shine on you. You cant just depend on looks, and you know me, i donno how to wayang wayang one:) and so ..... no more dreaming!!!!^_^

And so i was thinking and thinking....time passed and unbelieveably, it was soon 3 am plus, time for next feed for Dylan ....

on a lighter note....Dylan has learnt how to roll over into a crawling position!!! hurray. but that spells danger... let's hope he has neck support earlier than most other babies:P Then mama will use baby bjorn and bring you out.