Bump botherers
Pregnant? Now everyone owns your tummy - and knows exactly what's in it
I remember being in a Woolies queue when eight-months pregnant with my first son, Joe.
"Oooh, you are pregnant!" The woman in front of me beamed encouragingly. Genius. For a brief second, I thought she was going to slap a gold star on my forehead.
"Hah... yes," I mumbled distractedly, scanning the sweetie aisles caging us together, looking for a possible exit. But no, escape was impossible. Clearly Beamy Woman took my inability to vault waist-high shelves of confectionery as a sign of submission, so she took the opportunity to give my bump a good bothering.

"Ah," she said with a nod of unassailable authority, after having patted my bump from every conceivable angle. "You are carrying high. It's clearly a girl." She nodded sagely to everyone else in the queue. Many others nodded sagely back.

"Actually, it's a boy," I blurted out, defensively straightening my preggie shirt. "I have had a scan. Two scans, actually, and a 15-minute video. I have penis footage. It's definitely a boy."
My bump botherer went from beamy to thin-lipped. She glared at me as if I had said something nasty about her lineage.

"Ha!" she retorted, angrily. "Modern technology – who trusts it? No, it's definitely a girl. Mark my words." And with that rather ominous rejoinder, she gave my bump one last smug pat and wheeled herself off to the next vacant cashier... just before I brained her with my quarter-watermelon.

What is it about being pregnant that morphs your body into common property? It's hard enough actually being a human incubator without everyone treating you like one. It's enough to turn the meekest mommy-to-be into a watermelon-wielder.

Get a bun in your oven and the rest of the world pulls on baker's mitts. You'll be petted on buses, patted in queues, clucked at in lifts and patronised by sales staff. I had total strangers swing rings on chains over my belly and mad great aunts rhythmically rub my tummy as if it were a treasured talisman. And all this before my gynae even got a look in.

One of the things I find bizarre is how many people assume a heavily tummied person is pregnant. I mean, surely this often ends in tears? (When six months pregnant with my second son, Ben, I experimented with this idea. Every time a stranger asked me when I was due I said, "Actually, I just had a very heavy lunch." And then held eye contact and watched 'em squirm. Ha. Hey, it's hard for a pregnant chick to get her kicks.)
So what is the best way to handle bump botherers? I have a
bsolutely no advice. And with this admission... comes another. I bumped into my heavily pregnant friend, Mary, the other day. What is the first thing that I did? "Do you think it's a boy or a girl?" I squealed, beamingly. "Do you know yet? You have a baby in your tummy! Can I touch it? Can I? Can I?"

Mary looked at me, lips pursed. "Listen to yourself," she scolded.
I recoiled in embarrassment. "Well... I just love pregnant tummies," I mumbled. "They draw one's hand, like a magnet. You just have to touch pregnant tummies."
And therein lies the issue. Perhaps the reality of carrying a baby is so huge that you aren't supposed to be able to keep it to yourself. The joyfulness, the excitement... we are preprogrammed to experience these as a community. At least, that's what I've decided to tell Mary when next I reach out hopefully.......

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Just an article which i can identify with...anyway it is really a pet peeve when you have all these hands over your tummy when you are pregnant.

i dun mind friends. Besides they always ask, so i am perfectly alrite but not certain people!!!!!and u know what? they dun even ask u permission. dammit. i have this student who used to use a finger to touch it like poking it. damn irritating. and i told her off. and this morning i have another student who exclaimed: ms elaine, how come your tummy is smaller? I was so pissed off that i snapped : you better shut up. next time dun say this. i know i could have put it in a better way especially to a kid, but sometimes you are so sick being politically correct when you are a teacher. argh. and how like u aint suppose to swear when u are preggie and blah blah...... but people should really be more sensitive....:(
agh forget it.

anyway UTAC rebounded today and STAT shot up till 1.83 but i had already taken profit at 1.62. dammit. anyway sold off UTAC at 0.91 after buying it yesterday at 0.82. not bad huh. just within 24 hours.

okie waiting for dear dear to finish up so i can eat. Yeah...eat again . * yawn *