Sometimes i just feel so worried. No one will ever understand unless they have been a mom before.

I am my best. I take care of myself, and why did it have to happen to me? Yeah i know no such thing as perfect ...but i WANT IT TO BE PERFECT!!!!

woke up and had the runs ---twice. went to school. Was freezing cold. and it does not help w the temp being 19 degrees too. and was getting weaker and weaker in school. and then i had the runs again. went to the sick room to take my temp. 36.9 bloody hell. was sure the cold temp brought my fever down. it was in disguise. then later i had headache and was freezing cold and weak. still taught. and gave homework and lotsa instructions. and told my monitress to bring the class down for lunch as i was really weak. stayed in class to rest. did not eat. just ate 2 strawberries. gave the rest to the kids. had the runs thrice again i think. think i wanted to die........but tolerated till 3.45pm told elaine i cant do the bus duty and when i touched her hand she got a shock . she said i was ice cold. yeah . i was!!!!!. grabbed a cab ( fortunately at the top of the hill) and went home. struggled to make myself a cup of milo w/o milk . had the runs again. called my doc. he said it is ok. as long as i have no fever. i could not be sure. i din have a thermometer then . so i called dear to buy. was crying cause i was really scared and weak and everytime i stood up straight, i have abdominal pains. but fortunately itis high up. not near the foetus. touched my forehead often and was convinced i had a fever.... i took a pot , poured wated in it, put ice cubes and sponged myself. either i swim or sink. have to fight it myself cause dear wun be home till 6 plus. .......fell asleep for half an hour.

then he finally came back. he cooked congee for me. just plain one. and i had it with beancurd, the preserved type if you know what i mean . he had congee too w cai xin.
i took panadol cause my headached was splitting. i sponged myself 3 times... called the doc again , and he said that the fever should go down . i had a case of food poisoning. searched the net and the book on it. they said it could harm the foetus and cause miscarriage. din help my morale at all. was so sad inside.sigh. but i guess i have to be positive.

anyway. i just had breakfast macaroni in chicken broth. ordered delivery from PANTRY. www.pantry.com.hk ....a sausage( which i shouldnt cuase it is oily) and milo again. i had the runs twice again. but i am sure glad the fever is down. poor child of mine. :( mommy really feels sorry .