Please Remember......


When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and > said, I've got something to tell you. > She sat down and ate quietly. > Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. > Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know > what I was thinking. > "I want a divorce!" I raised the topic calmly. > > She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, > "Why"? >

> I avoided her question. > This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, > you are not a man! > > That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. > I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I > > could! hardly give her a satisfactory answer, she had lost my heart to a > > lovely girl called Dew. > I didn't love her anymore..I just pitied her! > >



With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated > that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. > She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent > ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for > her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I > had said for I loved Dew so dearly. > > Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected > to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of > divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and > clearer now. >


> The next day, I came bac! k home very late and found her writing something > at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell > asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew. > > When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not > care so I turned over and was asleep again. > > In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want > anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She > requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a > life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a > months time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage. > > This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to > recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. > She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her ! out of > our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going > crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd > request. > >



I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and > thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to > face the divorce, she said scornfully. > > My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was > explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we > both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy > in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to > the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in > my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, don't tell our son about > the divorce. I nodded, fe! eling somewhat upset. I put her down outside > the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the > office. > > On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my > chest.. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I > hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realised she > was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair > was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I > wondered what I had done to her. > >



On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy > returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. > On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was > growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry > her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday work-out made me &! gt; stronger. > > She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few > dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my > dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so > thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. >



Suddenly it hit me, .. she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her > heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. > > Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. > To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an > essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer > and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I > might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, > walking from the bedroom, through the! sitting room, to the hallway. Her > hand surrounded my ne ck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, > it was just like our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me > sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a > step. Our son had gone to school. > I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked > intimacy. > >



I drove to office... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the > door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind... I walked > upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not > want the divorce anymore. > > She looked at me, astonished. Then touched my forehead. Do you have a > fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I > won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I > didn't value the details of our lives, ! not because we didn't love each > other any more. Now I realise that since I carried her into my home on > our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. > Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed > the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. > > At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my > wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and > wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart. > >




The small details of your lives are what really matter in a > relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property , the money in > the bank, blah..blah..blah. These create an environment conducive for > happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be > your spouse's fri! end and do those little things for each other that > build intimacy.