wooooo hooooo!!!!

i am going home this 4 thirty pm today !!!! :)

tugging along me markings , hehe, me accessories and me wedding gown. ....cant wait to eat ... sg food. :) * satisfactory grin*

anyway ....there are a few photos i wanna upload, first will be the red coat which i bought for my collection:) and that will be the last of it. i already have a black ribbon one , a long one and plus this red one makes a very happy girl.


Went to lancome to trim my brows at 11 am yest, had lunch w dear, ( poor him ) he is still not feeling well, and then back to home to have a nap before returning to school for mass at 3 45 and left at 5 plus to rush my gynae appt at 6pm. queens road east was totally jamm and the bloody cab driver ( dunno for real or not) drove me to near the peak and then back down so i can avoid the traffic at Wan chai....and the bloody driver gave me less change in myhurry to get off the cab ( which is also my fault for not checking) . ..

but and at the docs, i had to stuff my self w water so that the ultrasound can work.i felt that my whole tummy was gonna burst cause i was so full....... anyway ...when trying to determine the gender of the baby, we thought we saw something sticking out between the legs. .....which makes the baby most probably a boy . BUT!!!!...let's see how. hehehe. if it is a boy , i will be ecstatic!!!!:P

okie i better go wash my clothes cause they have been sitting int he laundry basket for a long while....

eeeks!
i cant wait i cant wait! i cant wait to step home!!!! but i am a bit apprehensive about flying when i am preggie....but hell w it. i will just have to make sure i circulate the blood in my feet.

today i was quite so bouncing w energy, compared to the last time ( during the 1st trimester) when i was feeling so tired by mid day during the picnic of pri 1 and 2 , but today after i went to sai kung for a bbq w the school, i was still ready to go out w dear dear. ...
took some photos, will post them up....anyway i brought along a burger in the mornign cus i knew that eatign bbq food is no good for baby....anyway . i do not know how to do it. i know....i am SPOILT. i need people to do it for me..... hehe. and i dare not eat half cook meat( well they are not supposed to be) but you never know. and the hot dog and fish ball that i bbqed, were charred . hahaha!!!!. :)

anyway......went to causeway bay and just returned . i have eyes on this marks and spencer red coat, i realised that all my coats are black , brown ....anyway. so far the only ones i like was the last black double breasted one i bought months ago, the rest dun really look that good :P Vain huh....
yeah . and i went to the mango sale too. i bought my black cardi at 179 hk , which was supposed 300 plus. bloody hell and i just bought the red one a week back . bloody hell. i also bought this evening bag lace, and plastic clipshut. and a blue fur top and a cape coat , i think houndstooth patterned.:) ( which means dark color again) ---giving me the excuse to get the red coat tom....---that is if i can find my size. cuase i need size 8 , they onlyhad 10 in causeway bay today...hmmm.

sigh......my bloody uterus is giving me hell cus it is expanding like no one's business and i think my belly button is saying adieus.....need to put up the missing ad soon. it hurts sometimes. and i think i feel fluttereing sensation within the tummy....a little paranoid on how the baby is doing. if only i can do an ultra scan everyday....ha, but that is not healthy...and disturbing the baby alot....

i think i will know what is the sex of the baby by next week cause the external genitalia is forming... and also this fine brown hair call lanugo is covering the baby. apparently the baby is making facial expressions now, and can pee and shit now. heheh in my belly. ahaha.GROSS......
and by next week the baby can hiccup...:) see? i read up .....realy excited. i am more excited about it than me wedding. hahah . wat an irony....

http://www.tonya.me.uk/Baby/Baby-diary-pregnant3.asp?page=3

errr damn i dunno how to upload the file onto blogger. sigh. anyway . found a 15 week old fetus moving....feels like s/he is claustophobic ya know.....

Your Pregnancy: 14 Weeks

How your baby's growing: Head to bottom, your baby's 3 1/2 inches long — about the length of a lemon — and weighs about 1 1/2 ounces. Her body's growing faster than her head, which now sits upon a more well-defined neck. By the end of this week, her arms will have lengthened and will be in proportion to the rest of her body. (Her legs still have some growing to do, though.) She's starting to develop an ultra-fine, downy covering of hair all over her body (called lanugo). Her liver starts secreting bile this week, a sign that it's already functioning properly, and her spleen starts contributing to the production of red blood cells. She's also producing and discharging urine into the amniotic fluid, a normal process that she'll keep up until birth. You still can't feel your baby's movements, but her hands and feet (which are now half an inch long) are more flexible and active. Thanks to brain impulses, her little facial muscles are getting a workout as she squints, frowns, and grimaces. She can grasp now, too, and she may be able to suck her thumb.

1) I am getting more backaches
2) My hormones are running wild in the sense that i can be angry within seconds and feel like killing all the HK kids who just talk too loud. I should have been in jail by now, if not for the fact that i have been controlling myself
3) Apparently i can get nose bleeds becus of the blood circulation that is going up me head.( but i have not gotten them yet, and i really dun want to )
4) I have half dyed hair and i think me look horrible.
5)My nose is getting stuffier..... and it is supposed to. sigh.

You know what is the bloody difference between hk kids and sg kids.
BOTH interrupt which i really freaking hate, but . at the very least sg kids interrupt by starting off with MS CHUA MS CHUA MS CHUA. to try to get the permission to speak first, and the freaking hk kids just simply open the bloody mouth and rattle off. GAWD. HOW I HATE THEM....

Based on your preferred retirement age and the monthly retirement income you would like to receive, the total retirement income that you will need is reflected below.
There are 14 years to your retirement.
The total retirement income that you need at the beginning of your retirement is $654,600.
to bring you nearer that dream retirement by entering the "Next" button.

wah lau... how does a teacher get so much money---which is actually not very much to some? Shit it out? ...really regret now for entering the wrong industry ya know.

something when i was bored

hmmmmm

....must put down this joke from school else i forget...

One day, when i was going to fetch my kids from pri 1 B to the music class, one of the kids happily exclaimed to me this when we were all lining up.....

Boy:Ms Elaine, I have pee niece.
Me: ( Caught by surprised and kept quiet for a few seconds)
Boy: (Very happy and innocent smile on face )
Me: ( gulp, ---in cantonese---- oh you mean those that only boys have...( pause)....but you cant go around telling people you have....just keep it to yourself....that is good enough ...( and ruffled his hair)
Boy: ( Puzzled , and kept quiet...but nodded his head)
.....and the class was noisy as usual , so i was distracted and led them to the music class...


After music, I led them back to the classroom to take their stuff for Recess.
Boy: ( holding a container).Miss Elaine, you want some pee niece?
Me: ( gulp) ....total embarassment....Oh oh oh............................................................................
..............................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
..................................................................................................................
.......................................................you mean Peanuts.......:D

You guess what. he was trying to tell me he has some almonds( peanuts ) for break, and he was really happy with them , you could tell from the smile on his face.
Damn...what dirty mind i have.

I Only Want To Be With You


I don't know what it is that makes me love you soI only know I never want to let you go'Cause you started something, can't you seeThat ever since we met you've had a hold on me
It happens to be trueI only want to be with you
It doesn't matter where you go or what you doI wanna spend each moment of the day with youLook what has happened with just one kissI never knew that I could be in love like this
It's crazy but it's trueI only want to be with you
You stopped and smiled at me, asked me if I'd care to danceI fell into your open arms and I didn't stand a chance
Now listen honey, I just wanna be beside you everywhereAs long as we're together honey I don't care'Cause you started something, can't you seeThat ever since we've met you've had a hold on me
No matter what you doI only want to be with you
You stopped and smiled at me, asked me if I'd care to danceI fell into your open arms and I didn't stand a chanceNow listen honey, I just want to be beside you everywhereAs long as we're together honey I don't care
'Cause you started something can't you seeThat ever since we met you've had a hold on me
No matter what you doI only want to be with youNo matter what you doI only want to be with you

AND...... so i decided.....i will stop work in feb cause they have 2 weeks in feb. so it will be stupid not to be paid to have holidays:)

and it is only 2 more weeks to my wedding:) heheh i mean errr 19 days....yipee!!!!

today i wore a fushcia turtle neck and a short coat. that means my belly was not covered. the coat was denim with furry trims. i , of course , could not button it. and it was great that the kids finally saw that i was really PREGNANT!. alas , they could see the bulge. ahaha.
( not as if they become better behaved)

i bought cherries to eat after staying off fruits for last week.....was totally sweet. yum yumm:)
back to my regular diet. it has become a habit to take a cab back from school, drop at EPOCH, to buy soup to drink up at my aprtment before napping.:) i love the cream soup...cant get enough of that. sometimes i am rich enough to employ a chef. ahhaha. and just tell the person wat to cook .ahhhhh. food.---no wonder they call it the lubricant of the wheel of life. all themore when you are preggie.....once i am back i will get my hands on those frog porridge. totally delicious!!!!!i will eat it everyday. hahaha. and fish ball noodles and roti prata at 6th avenue for bfast everyday!!!!!!!! oh my gawd. think i gonna start drooling. better snap out of it:(

guess what.. i am so unlucky whole of last week.
i was saying on tues i had food poisoning. a bad cold on thurs and then on fri night , an asthma attack. i had to go to Ruttonjee hospital A and E.......after dear and i figure we should not take chances on me and baby. we spent a good deal fo half an hour to work on the neubuliser which i think did not dispense any drug at all to make me feel better and i keep wheezing. ...:( cant believe i spend 800 sg on it. sigh.

and the doctors at the hospital and service was mediocre but medical advice was horrendous. doctor keep irritating me by asking when was my last period even after i told them i was preggie. i mean shouldnt they ask how old are you now? stupid. even if they wanna know the EDD. all they need to know is how old me baby is now yeah.
N then when i needed some assurance and certainty from doc, doc said." erm this medicine is POSSIBLY safe....if you can , dun take it" ....i mean what the heck.....what do you mean by possibly safe?????YOU HAVE TO BE SURE MISSUS..... it is my baby's life you are talking about here. dammit.

i think to date i have taken 10 chloropheramine.( antihistamines) which i checked ---harmless. the sea coconut cough mixture , one panadol and 3 headache medddi and the stupid neubuliser which till now i din know if it worked...i really hope all these have no effect at all. i just feel so guilty for being so weak:(


anyway...met up with my kid April and her family for dinner on sat. at farmhouse.

and also met up with yp and alvin here. they are here on a holiday....so envious!!!!!!

Sometimes i just feel so worried. No one will ever understand unless they have been a mom before.

I am my best. I take care of myself, and why did it have to happen to me? Yeah i know no such thing as perfect ...but i WANT IT TO BE PERFECT!!!!

woke up and had the runs ---twice. went to school. Was freezing cold. and it does not help w the temp being 19 degrees too. and was getting weaker and weaker in school. and then i had the runs again. went to the sick room to take my temp. 36.9 bloody hell. was sure the cold temp brought my fever down. it was in disguise. then later i had headache and was freezing cold and weak. still taught. and gave homework and lotsa instructions. and told my monitress to bring the class down for lunch as i was really weak. stayed in class to rest. did not eat. just ate 2 strawberries. gave the rest to the kids. had the runs thrice again i think. think i wanted to die........but tolerated till 3.45pm told elaine i cant do the bus duty and when i touched her hand she got a shock . she said i was ice cold. yeah . i was!!!!!. grabbed a cab ( fortunately at the top of the hill) and went home. struggled to make myself a cup of milo w/o milk . had the runs again. called my doc. he said it is ok. as long as i have no fever. i could not be sure. i din have a thermometer then . so i called dear to buy. was crying cause i was really scared and weak and everytime i stood up straight, i have abdominal pains. but fortunately itis high up. not near the foetus. touched my forehead often and was convinced i had a fever.... i took a pot , poured wated in it, put ice cubes and sponged myself. either i swim or sink. have to fight it myself cause dear wun be home till 6 plus. .......fell asleep for half an hour.

then he finally came back. he cooked congee for me. just plain one. and i had it with beancurd, the preserved type if you know what i mean . he had congee too w cai xin.
i took panadol cause my headached was splitting. i sponged myself 3 times... called the doc again , and he said that the fever should go down . i had a case of food poisoning. searched the net and the book on it. they said it could harm the foetus and cause miscarriage. din help my morale at all. was so sad inside.sigh. but i guess i have to be positive.

anyway. i just had breakfast macaroni in chicken broth. ordered delivery from PANTRY. www.pantry.com.hk ....a sausage( which i shouldnt cuase it is oily) and milo again. i had the runs twice again. but i am sure glad the fever is down. poor child of mine. :( mommy really feels sorry .

I am so irritatable today. first, i cant brush my teeth in peace , next i can't shit in peace, what sparked off is bloody MAN U playing last night that made dear wanna stay up and watch and then getting into bed late and i woke up . i hate to wake up!!!!!!i want to sleep through. it is bad enough having to wake up to pee everynight.:( and dreams.

and i was very sure something will happen today and guess what? it did!!!> i fell down! while i was walking down the slope because my bloody shoes did not give that good a grip . dammit man. fug....:( i am so angry with myself. luckily nothing happen. actually it is all that dog's fault. i was distracted by the big dog infront of me w that ang mo woman, then the next thing. my left palm and my right knee were on the ground breaking the fall. dammit dammit. i was so scared. worried i might start bleeding there or something.( you know those things you see on TV). but i sustain bleeding on right knee and left palm only . and to make matters worse. i did not have tissue. nevermind. at least i am home now.

sob sob sob sob sob. my poor child. luckily nothing happen to you .

Some jokes at 11.40 pm on Sat

Am feeling nauseous these days.....:( wonder why. Isnt the sickness suppose to stop at the end of the first trimester???? hmmmmThink i am getting way too excited ...at the end of 11 weeks, but consider myself 12 weeks.. soon soon sooon.....

Ate at Shanghai la mian today . had tomato and salted pork porridge. have a craving for porridge nowadays... cant really stomach some other food. like the KFC i ordered tonight, did not eat much....horrible chicken breast meat. so hard...

went to sasa and bought 3 lovely lip balm. made from paraffin wax. strawberry , peach and red currant flavour. only using the red currant. think i am giving the other 2 away... also bought a bag . a big brown leather bag 70 SG. good buy i think. :) should carry a camera around...

yeah. i will get my butt ard to do it.

i went to the gynae again for appt and this time i could see my baby's face and limbs!!!! Baby was bouncing up and down when the doc pressed the probe against my tummy, but then this time he said I did not drink enough water so the utrasound could not be bounced back clearly....so we had the vprobe. this time we could ehar the heartbeat!!!!160 per min....sounds like the MRT train on the tracks before it stopped....really fast. supposedly it is twice of mine. also I tested for down syndrome:) and everything went well:) really relieved and happy...( Wed)

And on thurs, i went to Cocoon again to see how my gown is like and take the measurements. dear dear had his taken too. i decided to rent it, and let him buy. at elast for his , i think he can wear his tux again , but who the hell wears the gown again??? waste of money. so i rather rent. ( Thurs) ...had beef straganoff and russian oxtail borscht soup...the soup was yum but had a bit of indigestion after that , did not finish my beef straganoff so i just ate my mash potatoes...

( Fri) was feeling sick again. these few nights, although i need not work, not very restful cause i keep having dreams.....not nightmares but i keep waking up every freaking hour or so..:( sob sob. and i feel nauseous this morning!!!! i thought i was supposed to wean that off already???:((((( uso! sigh. but the highlight of the day was that i finally got my pearl necklace and bracelet from MADIA.CC at IFC. They are fresh water and off white and roughly about 500. aside from that also got a diamond ring. i mean the design is really exquiste, dear dear agreed to. i guess that is the most exorbitant item i bought then. guess how much? 19000 hk ...it was at first 21000, but had discount from HSBC.so about 4 k sg. told dear dear i will pay 2 k .

did not go to school today....
had lunch with dear dear. i wore my prettiest :P heheh a white cami and a yellow silk skirt. and beige trench coat....had lunch at cafepalace ...had scallop truffles soup while he had oxtail bisque, and my main was salmon and calm pasta in cream sauce, while he had pan fried sea cod.


yum yumm......then went to mikimoto to look at pearl necklace....saw a signature classic one 7.8 to 8 in size and about 15 inch long. was about 26 k hk. dammit. but it was sturdy and a good keep ,contemplating it. then went to tiffany thinking it would have been cheaper...and to my disappointment it was not as sturdy---the hold, but the size 8 was a good looker. was freaking 120 k though. dammit. so it is out of the question. mikimoto is good enough, but i think i will look at chomel in sg. if i can get a similar, no point buying the 26 k one. that is one months salary!!!!!!siao.


called mom on the way back and got pissed off again. she never fails to piss me off...z:( always comingup with new custom. dammit. how come people get married must give money to the whole goddamn world instead of people giving money to them . do you know weddings are expensive and i dun shit money.? how come i must give money to my brother and her? NO WAY!

and i reiterate. this is not a mood swing.

and i am not gonna let her look after my kid incase she thinks i owe her a big favour. hey mom you know what, what i am todayis 70 per cent of my own while the 30 percent is yours which comes from my earlier years. i dun believe i owe you and dad anything , except giving me food and shelter. call me selfish or an ungrateful wretched but i believe that you guys are horrible parents . horrible horrible horrible that dun plan much for me or give me good advice with regards to my future, thatnk goodness i have my own brains to plan., and not forgivng you dad for making me so badly wanting a scholarship so i dun have to owe you any university fees. else i would prob be working in a fugging bank also.

had stupid meeting in school which is very disorganised and went on till 5 thirty. damn and it is dark already cus it is winter. shared cab back with colleagues ....went home to discover the delivery man came at 10 thirty . of course i would not be home. i immediately called them to lash out at them . stupid fool., i already indicated in the evening. and who will be home in the morning. dammit. and i demanded they come the next day instead when they suggested wed. damn damn. luckily my cantonese is improving.so i can scold people. good training.

have big headache.....another point before i sleep . i must not pass my kid to my mom to look after when i have given birth.....mad at her. dun think she will be a good grandma.whole day just think of money!ironically i still love her. i hate the feeling when i am suppose to hate someone. yet i cant do so. dammit. stupid mom.

Sian......totally sian. slept at 10 plus, dear came back with my mee rebus and meesiam but i din even feel like eating. ***** up. i only ate the egg!!!!!!!!!!! can you believe that?

sigh. :( and mee siam is in the fridge. but one thing that made me happy for the baby is that i have bird's nest now. i think i am gonna be a kia su mom. ..anyway, before i write about this morning, i just remembered he proposed....yeah after his shower. he came out , got down on his knees, and then asked me to marry him, i was a bit surprised but now totally cuz he is always that goofy. anyway.....THERE IS NO RING!!!!!!!!!!!!. and so , i told him he must propose another time when we get the ring. hehhehe. 2 proposals.

but sian again this morning, woke up . ben and dear went macau. AGAIN!!!!. dun bother about him , as long as he does not w/d from credit card. and then, me woke up at 7 plus , then 8 plus then finally the bloody alarm rang. woke up and i drank a $100 worth of birds nest from the bottle, then went downstairs to buy my cheese, bacon and egg muffin. :( . not full. so small. maybe i feel sian cus i am still not full.

i have mbl later, but called to say i was sick. of course i lied. i really cant drag myself out anymore and put on a smile and sing children's songs and blah blah....:( michelle has not called back , let's see how later.......

Kind of life If je ne pas travaille.......


1) I do not want to be worrying about money
2) I want to wake up whatever time I can and drive to botanical jardin with my baby and eat breakfast.
3) I want a dog .
4) I want to be able to learn my french and jap at my own pace and make my child learn* devilish laugh* and have s/him practise with me. heehehe. To hell w dear.
5) Jazz piano ... need I say more.
6) Still look good. hehheh. and be able to bake and cook for my family.
7) Take afternoon naps.
8)Spend more time w my mom....bring her for holidays. ( so must have money)


Next question is how much money I need before I can ever do that? Can I ever strike a balance?


Below is an email from a 10 year old kid .... She has that ideal job....I used to have that..... Only to be let down...so I think those people who really love their jobs and be paid a damn lot are reallly lucky... even if you dun like your job ,you must be paid a damn lot, else you be a loser, how will you ever retire?? sigh.

sorry,exams just passed. i didnt do that well but better than mid year. maths,91 highest score. english,92. chinese 88.5,,big improvement. sience,97.5 cool, right?
so about my jokes,my fathers friend gave it to him.he gave em to me. the effie issue is going great! we couldnt stay mad at each other long.
enough about me, how have you been?what do you work as?if your job is stressful, than stamp right out of that door. . . free. cause my idea of a job is doing something you enjoy ,seriosly. and the best part is that you get paid to do it. my dream is to become a fashion designer! my clothes are going to be cheap,but not look cheap.or an architect. i could build wonderful mansions, either way everyone will get to know my name,and i get paid big time! i like to be my own boss.good luck with work. . . quuuuuuuuuiiiiiittt! bye!

After Sunset and Before Sunset.....

have you watched the beautiful 2? such mind engaging flims......especially the latter.....reminds me of what a cynic i have become in love after my parents divorce and 2 of my horrible r/s that made me actually engaged the coping mechanism of erasing the memories... i thank God for that i only remember certain parts of it. These 2 adults ( esp the guy) is complaining about their lives, musing how they are not contented about it , frequency of Sex for the guy , and how the confused dame wants to be loved and love , yet cant be around any men . crazy but yet it is true. Humans are always contradictory. We tell people we want that, but when we have it , we want something else.....My main worry is my marriage, not that i have no faith in it but that I want it to work out till I die. I want to be like an old lady and have him hold my hand or feed me or pinch my cheeks( of course by then it will be sunken) . Dont you feel tres joie everytime you walk past such old couples..?

Stuart cried in front of me in the staffroom while doing his Maths, i guess he was burnt out by not being able to cope with his school work and deluding himself into thinking he cannot cope. .. after some encouragement, it was ok.....however , i am quite shocked.


Yay dear coming back tommorow.....tommorow , i have a picnic .... be off at 12. 30. yay again!

okie...i had to eat dinner cus wl had to stay back in the office ...that means no one to eat dinner w me for the entire whole week cus he is going back to sg ... damn and that is not what piss me off. what piss me off is that that lady boss of his actually ordered 5000 hk dollars worth of pizza . what a waste!. damn 1 k of pizza for 15 people. huh!????? i mean yeah there were ang mohs but do they eat THAT much? BANKERS....just irritates me. argh.the way they earn so much and the way they spend. damn damn so unfair. no wonder the whole world wants to get into banking industry. cus that is where the money is. and WE KNOW IT. yeah... seriously.... if you have that much money , dun flaunt too much then you earn my respect. and since you DO EARN THAT MUCH . go do some volunteer work . ahah. am i asking for alot.?

sometimes when i pass bala or velvet , i ask myself ...are the same old dudes just gonna stay and hover ard there till they are 40( mind you ..... some of them actually are!)? used to hang out w a few of them and i realise that yeah . they were basically just winding down. but somehow....they actually also knew that they could not be doing that every fri. .. booze and gers. booze and gers. empty stuff. it is fine if you just hang ard for a few drinks. every one needs some company at the end of the day , esp when you are a swinging single living alone. but . the gers part.... could be scrape.

okie..... that's enuff of the topic.


i was in the tub just now thinking trying to let the reality sink in more. --- that i am a mom now. sigh. more responsibilities.....


here is a list that i made again...
a list of things that i stop/start doing when i am a grown up ....

1) i learnt to eat by myself in the public.....used to be shy. cus i always think people are staring..esp in NUS arts fac. but as time goes on , for survival sake , i had to eat. i learnt to eat in coffee shops during breaks between tuition.
2) i outgrown the love of the synthetic electronic organ and developed the love for the authentic original sounding piano.
3) i knew i must not go under the sun w/o sun screen --- but still lazy and forgetful to apply , and so i just helped my cells by not going sun tanning.
4) i adopted the love of just lying down on the couch or bed listening to music. not necessarily w any company or wine. ;)
5) i have grown the love for beer.----only heineken , calsberg , or jap beer,etc.BUT!!!!!not ever tiger. horrible tasting.and bien sur,...i have stopped now.
6) I HAVE NOT STOPPED---shopping, or started putting on moisturiser, or foundation --i think they will clog my pores, i have not learnt how to make my bed, and i am glad i am not living w my mom who nags at that,

more more... will add if i think of some more
7) i still have not stayed in park hyatt tokyo, gone to kyoto on my own , seen sakura, been to france, spain, greece, plucked any real berries , learned french and jap fully , mastered photography, cook curry and fish , and learned jazz piano.so i must not ever die yet. i have yet to named my kid. oh ya. and when i grow old -- like my mom . i must learn dancing again.



oh ya, this brought back the most horrible insult ---that i am ajack of all trades , masters of none... by that lim koon lan bitch who retired from rgps already . ( who never got married) you see gers who dun get laid and married by a certain age should be put down , because they can turn cranky ---just like the lady boss of wl who ordered 1 k of pizza. yeah . lim koon lan said that.-----cus she was wondering why ami alwasy so busy in rgps , and scramblin outta there at 1 pm always... my dear... that is cus the school dun pay me well and i have to work . and guess what i make a good lot of money outta it enuff to pay my bond and more, while also teaching my kids well in rgps. for you info ,... they are the second top class for english. and noooooooo. you dun look at that!!! you just look at what fame can i bring to rgps or if i am punctual for meetings. damn you . tight arse anal. i dun feel guilty at all. i do not owe you any explanation. and you dun deserve the 600 k pension the gov't pays you. dammit. so unfair.


crimson RED

OKIE...back from diner.after i went grocery shopping AGAIN .....another 40 bucks.....sigh. i have been spending alot of money on groceries. dammit man. cant help ....:( i tell you that is whypregnancy is so expensive.---it is because of the food we preggies eat. not the operation or whatever. i guess the food we eat throughout the 9 months can be comparable to the amt for surgery....cost about 4 k in SG but 35 k hk here so 7k sg in hong kong.....

i just realise i have insurance cover for one of my policies. wooohooo.. will check it out.

any way. i think i am working throughout.... and will work till prob avril then stop rest....

here is the list that i hope to do while idling.:

1) watch more korean drama
2) brush up on my french vocab/ jap vocab. ----i give up on grammar. heheh
3) do some photoshop----do up some pretty photos from my wedding to decorate the house
4) ( only in my dreams) learn how to bake..... i guess i will more likely end up learning how to cook curry , and fish. more important. :)

cest est par maintenant! :)

anyway. had a good day today.
woke up at 8 plus to say bye to dear and Ben .
then ate cornflakes, raisins and kueh lapis , and then watched a bit of tv . then went to sleep again .

later i woke up at 11 . 30 took a hot shower then went to work ....

it was okie at mbl , but pissed off cause i do not agree with the way they run the school . some students are actually really good at piano playing. but yet , they are re enrolled again at the next module which is simpler. stupid. . cant the school just let them move on to higher grade. stupid. waste and cheating people ofmoney.

anyway. winston's daddy asked for my number cause they are looking for a [rivate tutor. i just gave it to them . did not bother about telling them i was preggie.later will do.

then took the mini bus home at 2 plus and bought crabmeat linguine and corn soup for lunch.
was yummy but the crabmeat was a bit salty and the corn soup was chinois style...would have preferred the anglais style ya know..

then ate in front of the tv and watche seven swords....flipped thru cam cam jap magazines are realised i cant wear pencil skirts anymore. i cant button up . my tummy is getting bigger....damn ...but anyway... looking forward to the new. me... heheh

talking about children. i have this kid in mbl called simon who keeps smellign me affectionately. so funny. dunno why. he will run and run when the music is played, then suddenly he will grab my arm and sniff at me. i mean really sweetly. so sweet huh. weird. but i am a bit wary if he having snuffy nose. do not wanna catch the flu bug againg:)

sigh. think i gonna sleep some more. nothing to do anyway. i lost the passion to pick up a language book to study . get tired... think i will do so when i rest in april or may june july...:) at least it gives me something to do yeah. ?;)

okie okie. i have never been so star struck in my entire whole 26 years. i was in the same lift as edison chen!!!!! bloody hell . i cant believe my luck and he talked to me first!!!!
he asked if i was going to the 3 rd floor bridal shop. and i started babbling........ i said i was not local and then i said that i know who is he and i dunno how to react and say. and i blush big time. damm....and then the lift door open.

he is damn cute . and he was dressed in berms and he has a polka dot black hand phone bag haning from his berms.
damn . i am going to be smiling the whole night.
okie let's put it this way. he is overtaking the place food in my psyche.

http://blog.honeyee.com/edison/

FOOD!

YEAH....food is da only thing on my mind when i wake up to pee at night , when i sleep , when i get up and when i go to sleep. what the heck. and i am still skinny. argh. i must have my mee rebus, roto prata, mee siam, and chicken bake rice and ikea meat balls,( oh shit i should go and check it out in hk too) and my mom's white promfet fish, and soup and teo chew porridge and blah blah...:( feel so miserable ..!!!argh! i am going crazy thinking about it.

well at least todya's lunch is not too bad. i had cream of broccoli and chicken wrap again. w spinach. see i try to be healthy . really i try!!!! and it's too bad if the bloody baby does not get it. and i am taking my folic acid and my vit c and really took lotsa rest and on top of tha. try to organize a wedding for myself .:) see. like today . i slept at 12. 4o pm plus then woke up at 3 plus to call the shops and make appts for the rest of the week. i have to go down to Tsim sha Tsui to check out this st call Kimberly road to check the prewedding photos.

and i did a check list.cost will be about 30 k ...hmmm...la argent la argent. see i told you . those people who say money dun mean a thing are out rite lying. w/o money . you cant even get married. sigh. everything cost money. you even have to give the justice of peace money. think next time i wanna be a justice of peace. can eat wedding dinner and get ang pao. hahaha.

wedding check list :

1) la menu , the decor, the size of tables, the ring pillow, the dummy cake, the guest book
2) the wedding band , the ring
3) pre wedding photo, oil painting, gown rental
4) custom make gown / suit and fitting.
5) videography and photography on that day.--- check out lettherebelight.com i think they are very good
6) wedding favours
7) wedding invites and guest RSVP ...considering. i am calling them from hk .but really happy that alot of them are so happy for me. think i am pregnant and emotional but i am really touched.
8) hair and make up
9) Rental of jewellery
10) finding a justice of peace.


more of less settled everything:)

La vie est Belle!!!!!! Tres marveleux!! If i got that right:)


I am now getting used to work again after that long break , and am used now to taking care of my body . I am still having the runny nose but at least i eat healthily ....vit c, folic acid, vit b supp, and wheat drink , milo , frsh milk , whole meal bread, and i cook my food.. :) hehehe. proud of myself.

actually pissed at mom for not coming over to hk to help me , i i figure i will do it on my own , she is not that strong too , so just let her stay in sg .w her doc appts,and my pampered bro. argh.. wash my hands off him . that silly guy. ....i need to source for birds nest to drink now. cant believe i spend 200 bucks on cordeceps and then dint take . i dun think i wanna mix the medicines w the vits. not good for kid.


also in the midst of getting hold of my frens to come to my wedding. really glad how most of them agree. especially those who you have not kept in touch for long but they are always there to share your joy. :) really happy . indescribable ya know. geese did i spell that right>

and on top of that i have to source for so many things for the wedding!!!. damn. it is really so many a thing to do. decor, la musique, gown , pre wedding photo, haird do , jewellery , gifts, tables, la menu, cake blah blah......but i guess it will be worth it in the end. :)

ohhhhh. i need to get the invites out soon.....

dear chose a very tekong menu.. , cold cuts sharksfin and crab roe, and one piece of abalone, and peking duck , yam prawns and scallops , noodles and pudding for desert. some of my favs, yum yum. :)

okie. time for my aft nap. so sleepy.

i am thrilled.....!:)
baby is 1.27 cm and s/he is 7 weeks old.....:) . heheh. the size of the coffee bean .
but i am strickened with guilt for not being in the best of my health. i want the best for the kid...i dun think i have already been a good mom rite from the start by being asthmatic and using my inhaler. i did not know i was pregnant.

:( and then i caught the flu bug from the kid from mbl. damn . and was totally paranoid of what to eat for medication . panicked as my top palate was totally swollen and congested .so i tool serrayzme. but in the morning when i called the doc all the way in spore she said it was ok to eat eat paracetamol and chlorophenamine. i will prolly do so later. went to buy some baby books too.

dear dear has been nicest. he is being much more caring in the sense he alwasy try to hold my hand when i walk, i cant walk too fast now. i feel bloated but my tummy does not really show now. and i guess this also explains why i am nauseous. but the doc prescribed vit B for me to curb that. folic acid too. i make a vow to myself i will eat healthily from that day onwards.:) i will:) and baby will be fine. :)
i just want the first trimester to pass successfully . i am so scared inside you know. but i know i can do it.

......................kodomo ga arimasu.....................

totemo shinjirarenai................

totemo hayai, dakedo, hontoni tanoshii!!!!!!!:)

gonna tell mom later after i shower.....

is it a boy or a girl?
damn it ruins my argent plans though . hehehhe. but still very happy.

makes me take a break.

http://numericlife.blogspot.com/

quite interessant....anyway.....


been a while since i wrote. sigh . been lazy. and been nauseous and having craving for funny things. and i HATE my canteen food.!!! i am conditioned to puke when i see it. yucks. they are so gross. those. sweet sour pork and salted veggie soup. and horrible cabbage. who eats cabbages as vegetables? not fit to be eaten. should have some leafy greens!!!! yucks.
and soup is so oily. i swear till dec that i am working there i will be bringing my own lunch.

anyway. ryan is opening up to me. so cute. he actually will wave to me and talk to me now. twain loves me too. edison always say hi to me loudly when he sees me. happy being ard them. ...i saw this ger from 1a in west villa. she was practically dancing ard me when she saw me. think the mommy was not really happy when she saw that the teacher was young. then relieved when she realised that i was only her music teacher. hahah. silly...anyway....i am getting used to the nottie pri 1 kids.

the dictation for this time round is quite badly done.. johnson got his marks and he cried. poor fellow. too bad for him. who ask him to be such a blur ****>.always. building castles in the air. if not that i always call his name in class, i think he would have done worse.

sigh.....okie okie..i will check again tommorow.if it is true. i prob only be up till 28 end of jan.......

http://glenngreenwald.blogspot.com/

anyway. was just thinking... i never ever liked politics...my psyche is too diffusive to absorb such things , it's too heavy for me. i would just rather wanna know the main story and tha's it. no point debating about it. not like others.

I was given this book in st nicks.... was told i appeared shy, till today , i suspect i am...

http://www.adaydreamer.com/adaydreamer.htm

am i a voyeur? i stumbled upon this beautiful website . anyway. i really love photographie couture. but i simply have not gotten the time to explore it yet. you need the time to devote to it , to get the equipment , to get a bon laptop that does not have silly pop ups like this silly one. argh....

anyway. i watched STEPHORD WIVES --did i spell that correctly , this evening after musikbox...such a sexist movie. stereotyping us women. dun like. of course husbands wld wan wives to be perfect but wldnt us women wan our hommes to be goody goody good too? . and then the movie ends with a feeble attempt to be not sexist by trying to put in a twist by making the DR who makes all the robot wives , a robot husband himself. and it turns out it was his wife who was the mastermind of the whole episode....argh. i wld only applaud this movie for the costume and aesthetic part of it. but the whole idea is simply a turn off. they should have stephord husbands, it would be more sensational.

anyway. called jean and dawn. no one picked up my fone!!!!i am so bored here , actually i am grateful to be given time to rest, but more of bored.....:( and i started thinking of ma mere. if i am that bored, it's kudos to her on surviving 4 years w/o me living w her.....sigh. i am glad she changed from a control freak to a better mom. but i feel age is catching up w her and i am sad inside.. if the average lifespan of a woman is 80 that leaves her 30 years more...:( sorry that i am so morbid to think of such, but i wan to make her more happy. i will bring her on a tour soon. really wan her to come here for a holiday.

i have been a sloth this weekend cause i only have musikbox, theoretically i can just rot and slack at home , but nooooo. i actually wanted to work in musikbox, so i gotta get my butt there by 12. 45 and teach till 2. 15...sigh. actually i dun like the way they run the company , cheating the parents of the money in a way cause some of the stuff is not sensible and sometimes if the kid miss lessons, they make up for the lesson by going into another class totally irrelevant. how good can that be? :( i dun like it.

anyway. i have been watching entourage and i think it is terrible. not a good one but sad to say, i was to lazy to get out of the couch to do anyother thing. i have not even been painting my nails and dyeing my hair!!!. anyway... the characters in there are totally spoilt brats n i hate such people. not practical . you should be more thrifty, i mean yeah. you are an actor, but if you ain t successful why waste your money on a rolls royce . and a house. argh and pass over a 4 million dollar movie. argh. i think they got me heated up there. silly people. lazy bummers.

getting bored at home , so let me do a summary of myself.

loves of my life at 26.:

( food)

sorbet, foie gra, escargot, salmon, baked chicken rice, egg, mee siam , mee rebus , 6th avenue fish ball noodles, uni, chawanmushi, instant noodles, tom yam soup, borstch soup, ikea meat balls , ikea's broccoli soup, chickent soup, heineken beer, calsberg. red wine w orange juice, riesling, chicken wings, mommy's sea weed soup, her chicken soup.


( musique)

( langues)
french, spanish---i like the rrrrr sound. dear dear can do it very well, japanese.
i like cantonese songs, but i hate crude cantonese, especially when i get overdose of it.

(couleur)
bold and pastels, contrast.
i do not like small prints, but i love contrasting prints, i hate retro prints, i think they are very distaseful.j'aime animal prints.

laces, velvet, lycra, satin, silk , ribbons, chiffon. i do not like shatung silk though.

sigh...and so baby is gone to singapore leaving me here ...but no choice. i have musikbox la. and i hate short trips cause it is so tiring. besides, i am not interested in Hazel's wedding. someone who likes him before...anyway...

i lied about returning to sg to the school so i can avoid sunday walk to aberdeen park . so stupid. they call it fun walk . i call it silly walk. damn. i just wanna teach and mark and go home. dun ask me to do all these silly things. argh. besides your principal pays me peanuts. ...should have gone to st clares. how to pay rent?

was watching the show ' wishing tree" on tv. in cantonese. me fav edison.....cutie. i have this student in school who will grow up to look like him i think cause he also has very cute dimples. :) very cute boy. i like those cute boys with dimples. hehhe. no paedophile but just think they are really adorable. of course most of the times they are naughtier, but how much can you scold them....heheh so DOES IT PAY TO BE BETTER LOOKING? :pp

anyway.....i bought a dress in ZARA. .. with a sheath collar , black lycra/ spandex and cotton , and a mock big bow behind...:) and locotaine eye cream ( think i spelled that wrongly ) ..it is quite good cause it gets absorbed quickly..



argh . damn karen just called... about the bloody test paper that i named '***** up" have already done my job and given to her

pardon me if you think i am really vulgar in here. i guess it is my only outlet.complaint counter.

http://threebeautifulthings.blogspot.com/

dun ya think this site is something ?

anyway. today is PTA parents association fun day . so]uppose to be a public hol but still have to go back to school for 2 hours to mingle with the parents. i saw Ryan!..:)

the cute little boy from my bus that tells me a chapter of thomas and the train story in ENGLISH everyday.... seriously. he knows i do no understand canto, and he actually says it in english . how sweet..... seriously...

yeah., and hong kong has this sillday call DRESS CASUAL DAY.that is people donate some money so that they can dress casually to work. yeah . so i wore jeans. what big deal huh.....silly day. cant they have .. something like speak softly day ? or go home early day , or speak good english day....

anyway.....i went to la foret to shop after school today at causeway bay . went to marks and spencers. and shop. bought a gold plated chain . and earrings and a gold ring. all gold plated of course...:) the gold chain can go well with the trench coat.hehhe...cant wait for autumn. actually it is suppose to be autumn already. it has been moon cake festival...but i have yet to eat a moon cake..:(

sigh......tired and i hate bad english

. if you dun understand , say you dun , dun give me the wrong message and then cause trouble

damn . i really appreciate spore govt now---only for the education they put me through.

from today onwards,

i am not gonna bother to correct the english in the stupid eng worksheets set by the previous teacher( prob a hkger)
and i am not gonna bother to ask the kids to write in the vocabulary book ,
and i am just gonna teach based on text book
and i am not gonna bother to shout keep quiet and just raise up my 2 fingers,
i am not gonna to collect hw from lazy kids, just wait till last minute---they only have themselves to blame,
i am not gonna bother to shout walk faster and just walk faster, they will follow.

it is final ...hk kids are self centered-- bad english , and talk loudly.
no wonder..

and i am totally abhorred at how they argue w each other, makes me wonder how the parents teach them.

well...one year. then st clares.

sigh......soon it is the end of holidays...
came back from Wynn and it was fantastic. :)

the room was fantastic cause the hotel upgraded dear to a suite. let me figure out how to put the video of the room online via mytube.
the oteira was even bigger than the living room!!!! the tub is a jacuzzi and they even provide a pillow for the head to rest in the tub.

dun forget the tv in the bathroom.

and i cant forget the coffee maker in the room :) and they even have an ipod player in the bedroom.

__________________________________________________________________

tha is for saturday.....and i finally got my cheque for mbl. minus kids on air. damn . they are so unprofessional, how to expect to keep the staff if you are so unprofessional. anyway... i also got my first pay from rosaryhill!!!:)

anyway..i came across this blog about this ITE girl in singapore. seems like her family is in a dire state. http://godblessyou88.spaces.live.com/

at least now i feel more fortunate. what a meanie....am i. to be happy on others unhappiness. but there you go , i think i should start appreciating what i have more.


________________________________________________________

mommie came back from malaysia and she said it was a terrible death for ah kim. her lungs were puntured, ribs were broken and half her face was gone. at least she died instantly...sigh. at least ah gu is also gone , so she has a companion, to where ever she may go. i miss her ci xiang face though :(
_______________________________________________________________

oh yeah and i bought a black coat from marks and spencer.. this one in the picture is the cream coloured one. i think the ribbon was the thing that caught my attention. i have a weakness for ribbons. ( and lace, and chiffon and silk) hehhe:P

_____________________________________________

ahhhhhh.....
finally clearetd my table , cleared the markings ....i hate marking dictation, the marking scheme is simply stupid. my style in singapore is simple... you learn , you get the marks,

you dun ... just too bad, i am not gonna bother whether you put full stop or not, each one wrong , one mark deducted, what makes you think punctuation is less expensive than a word... stupid. afterall i did say out the full stop . you din hear it , your bloody business...

i forgot to add , i repeat the passage 4 times. SLOWLY!!!


sigh. stupid hkeess.....put in so much effort, yet they cant improve their english. they dun understand. it is the enviroment, if you dun speak english to your kid... what r the chances your kidd gonna improve????? argh

anyway...i cant wait for the weekend. be staying at wynn. the new hotel at macau.
sigh . cant bear to think of him gambling but at least i can get to relax... and i love portugese food!!!! ox tail soup , baked stuff .... yum yum...

i have been watching desperate housewives and i must say the second season s quite disappointing.... first of all i must say that some of the things the women do in the show are absolutely stupid. and you simply just wanna go into the goggle box to strangle them for even existing... what bimbos....

btw, , went ot wong tai sin today . went to see a fortune teller for fun.... 60 sg. bloody ex huh...not gonna spew my future over here , so there. . all i must say is that there are many of them there. it either goes for 100 bucks or 60. maybe i should train to be one too. not too bad a living isnt it. easy money.

i went to check out a chanel bag today. i saw it in the store. and guess what...bloody ex.....3600 sg. over my dead body i buy that. call me cheap skate or something. but if i actually buy that now, guess how much i must spend next to satisfy myself? no way.....and i am only 26!!!dun tell me by the time i am 40 i have to spend 100 000 on bag?

CHECK THIS OUT!!! SOMETIMES I WISH I WAS IN JAPAN NOT IN HK.

http://www.glumbert.com/media/tonguetwister

i have been seeing alot of gore in HK tv ....i thank God that sg censor some of the gore back home. spare me that. chopped up hands and the hei she hui ....eeeeks.disgusting...


back in school ...the joke of the day was teaching the meaning of the word" miscellaneous" to the kids. you know how they call their teachers MISsy ...so they actually thought the word iscellaneous meant something about me!!! can you believe it????good gracious.....i hope this class can really improve on their english by the middle of the school year. met their parents today ...it was parents day...it is a universal problem . kids dun read much . too lazy .......and so???//what do we have to do ? we have to encourage them. force them..... sigh. maybe they can start to listen to more Britney spears and christina...maybe that will help hehheh.

anyway....i indulge myself in 2 jap magazines ..to cheer myself up and to prep for clothes to wear in autumn. hehhe aint i vain. but anyway. as long as i am alive , i will make sure i dress well. at least nicely , it is the basic politeness isnt it. besides your day is a dreary already , dun you think you feel better if you dress better.

i reckon my motivation to work everyday is actually food.....
when i wake up in the morning i drag my arse to the kitchen to heat the water to make coffee....
then shower. i can be ready in half hour...and then when i am washing up the water boils, once i am done , i make breakfast to eat. i MUST EAT . IF I DO NOT EAT BREAKFAST , MY WHOLE DAY GOES WRONG.......dammit..... it is the most important thing in the world. and i pick my clothes to wear the night before...:) so it is not that rush in the morning....and so 7 days a weeks go like that......and it is gonna be this way for 3 years....and it is only 1 month..:) :(

i look forward to going to tokyo from hk . will be so much shorter.. hehheh. that will be one of the few reasons why i wnan live in hk i guess.

wish time passes faster , so i am richer, so i can afford not to wrk so hard and learn my jap and french again. :) i miss them . but i dun wanna take courses here, still not in my budget. .

me sick...cough cough and the whole of sun nigh, inspite of going tobed at 8 thirty , i did not get well and i felt my whole throat inflammed... saw a doctor on mon, b4 that called elaine at 6 am and told her i cant do bus duty and 7 i called ms poon. today i went to school to give them hw to do . hmmmm the class seem quieter. good. hopefully when i am back on wed it is better.

when i came to staff room in the morning, everyone was like huh , how come you are here. hmmm.. maybe i should not have come. well, they did ask if i was ok....but i am too tired to say i am ok in cantonese. hmmm but it is funny that they ask me rather than ask ellie or phoebe when they are sick. maybe mine is the bloody virus 2 days in a row.

Classic black bag which i want and will get eventually. i guess if i end up buying all the other bags , it will be an accumulated waste of money , why not just get a classic piece? of course, the chains must be more sparkly....

oh i finally ate at the french place ....and my colored macaron. expensive...18 dollars a piece.. i mean hk $ . cest crazy. but it's worth an experience....the tea was great though.

also realised melvin knows andrew , and that andrew was suppose to meet melvin's colleague at r and t too for dinner. wat a small world huh.....

had uni again:) i love uni....and my foie gras...expensive stuff. good for once in a while. really appreciate the chance of being able to eat them .it is good to eat them only once in a while cause if they are ready too easily , then the novelty will wear off.

no wonder the rich always need different seasons of products in their haute coutre ( oh did i spell that right?) to satisfy them , because they are rich , so they need a change of taste regularly and new stuff to keep up with their hunger...poor them ya , never to experience the joy of having to achieve something again by having to work for it , cause everything is so easily available:)

...........sashiburi ne...
anyway. i just hope i do not forget all my japanese and french , intend to take them up again only next year , till i have worked my ass off for all these hk children.
anyway. they are quite a pain , not all of course but the bloody classrm is air con , so the noise is contained and then if i turn on the fan, it blows the dust around and i am very very allergic to it. sigh.

and Karen is so irritatin , everyday she has something to say about my out fit , i mean , i dun care if it is even a compliment, or not , just SHAAAADUP...i dun care you know. but given me, i will just nod and smile or whatever. damn ...and she is just a gan joing spider. how could she be so stupid as not to know that she can earn more by giving tuition, and she is already older than me.......argh . silly bitch. and so monday i will pile all the books on her table for her to check . you wanna check , go ahead and check silly woman. goood..... i let it all out.

and i am sick again. prob because i did not get enough rest last week , had guests in my place. jh and thomas, they were good company though. a good change lah. so no complains.a pity i had not enough time to bring them ard .
jh was also sick on sat, if not she could have gone to stanley beach.

at nuit. just wished my sleep could have not been interrupted with wl getting up to pee so often.
also doors must be shut slowly and considerately...
i am sooooooooosleeeeeeeo py. waiting for 12 noon to come so i can get ready for music box....meeting melvin later after class.

this month's splurge.............

1 bon jour blusher
2 m.a.c eye pencils....silverbleu and frosty mint
1 pasar malam cardi vert
2 tank top blanc et pink
1 nine west patent shoe flat vert
1 silk overall
2 silk skirts and 1 bleu cardi
1 coat of course a steal..

talk about being a good ger...
and i think i lost a 500 dollar note.. must have dropped it when i took out keys from wallet. argh. or maybe the 50 dollar also look like that colour. :(


and it became 31500 and 0nly 5000 for oct
7000 mbl ?

sigh. my lungs just give me crap. i hate the inhaler. i feel so dependent on it sickly. anyway. lets see how much chinese medicine can help.....

i did not keep to my resolution . i spend $400!!!

I have not gotten my pay from Mbl cause i have not asked for it...how unprofessional. hiyah.....nevermind. but at least i know the company will not close down. Dear and i bought season 2 of grey anatomy! yay!!!!!
we watched election 2 too. it was so grotesque and morbid and violent ...too much gore for my liking. feel nauseous...

anyway.....school today was a little irritating. i kept tellling myself i am only working for the money and not taking it too seriously. else i will die of heart attack. i took the mini bus alone!:)) double proud!!! and then i met elaine at the tram station. she was late. anyway. i will meet her directly at the tram station happy valley tommorow. such a waste of time and money. i am such a scrooge.

i was tad irritated at el meeting today. i t was english but conducted in cantonese. so i told karen. wo mak dou mm ji.. well. basically i had her to repeat everything in english....of course i told her tactfully....

anyway....the boys in the class really talk alot. sigh. thank goodness i have the mike. i just look forward to my savings at the end of year. if you ask me if i like today. i would say.....it is ok. it can be better..:) but like dear say....no one really likes their job. if they do---- they are really lucky. i should stop being too idealistic:)

You are in a state of constant expectation and want interesting and exciting things to happen to you. But in fact, you are a 'Walter Mitty' at times - a dreamer - over-imaginative and often given to fantasy or day-dreaming. There is nothing wrong in 'dreaming' - how boring life would be if one just followed the doctrines of everyday life - but one must not continue leading a life of continuous fantasy. You need to face reality in spite of all its possible shortcomings.Being a likeable person you get on well with neighbours and friends. You don't need anything to 'Rock your boat'. You want to 'love' and to be loved'.The way things are, you feel that you are stuck in a rut and there is not much you can do about it. You feel frustrated and inhibited but if you can find a way to let yourself go, you may find that things aren't quite so bad as perhaps you thought they were. One consolation is that since you are an extremely emotional individual, with the right person you may be able to release some of that frustration and tension with some mutual tender loving care.It is said that we are all influenced by our environment and indeed you are no exception. It would seem at this time that even though you may be surrounded by people, you are experiencing an inner loneliness. Fortunately you are sufficiently strong minded to realise that life has a great deal to offer you and that you may miss your share of experiences if you fail to make the best use of every opportunity. You therefore pursue your objectives with a fierce intensity and are prepared to commit yourself deeply and readily. You believe that whatever you would like to do or think 'you can do' - you do! It is because of this attitude that you may be considered by others as arrogant and even conceited, but its fair to say that whatever it is that you really want out of life you will put your heart and soul into it and will not take 'NO' for an answer.You are putting on a show - a facade. You are a master of demonstrating considerable charm in the hope that this can or will lead to better things. Deep down you are fearful that this may not work and that you may have to employ other strategies in order to realise all your ambitions.

today... i woke up early cause i had to go to Mbl ... wanted to take the mini van. but was a little afraid i be late. and just nice. michelle called. ....she was scared i am not in time to prepare the class. what the heck....i sure know what me is doing rite.... anyway.... i did music piano, harmony and my first touch.
i hate kids who throw their tandrums ard. there was a ger whose mom said i could call her Happy , ironically , she kept pushing the toys ard adn kept to a corner...silly kid. and i could not waste much time trying to warm her up., so i just left her alone. i hate to stand in for other teachers cause the kids might not warm up to you in time.. well well...

anyway , later dear dear came up and i brought him to the donut shop...it was so sugary adn sweet ..yummy.... and then we walked ard. i finally bought my foot file and a shimmer blusher. i tot my estee lauder one was not doing good. i cant seem to find M.A.C anywhere. damn i need my concealer....:(

yesterday i actually bought a silk overcoat. 140 bucks... not too bad as it is 100 % silk. will wear it soon:P

Today I discovered the pantry....very damn important....found a microwave.
Shared lunch with albert again cause it was a hug packet save money.
finished the last bit of my classrm board.
learn how to speak a bit more cantonese.
Miss poon said that one of my students have cancer....
one of them is going back to Canada.
then , learnt a lot of French in the staff room. n
Decided and planned for the next holiday and maybe going to Vietnam.
i will buy silk........SILK!!!!!!!MY amour. J'aime beaucoup.!!!!

but i do not like thai silk. it is so thick.....or maybe i keep seeing the thick version.

Indian silk is lovely.


i badly need to dye my hair......argh. It is so gross ---the regrowth.


I also decided.... by Age 27 30 + 54.7 ( End of August 2007)

i discovered that i actually love working with my colleagues. i just dun understand why in singapore the people are so selfish.....:( especially at Raffles girls primary. no warmth at all.
over here. though communication is a barrier and i have my moods but at least the general mood is good. and They are quite sincere in helping.....it is final . i hate raffles girls primary staff. big time. SHAME ON YOU! YOU SHOULD COME HERE AND LEARN SUCH WARMTH AND CARE.

today.....i decorated my classroom board.. yay! it is finally done.
i am wondering how am i gonna call the parents up and speak in cantonese and tell them what bus no. to take . good gracious. anyway.......lets see tommorow.

today....i learnt so much french sneaking away peeks at my book during the presentation....dadadadadad.

and also there was a slight jam on bus 6 on the way back. i feel left out in the conversations of my colleagues and i walked real fast past them. i mean who cares? i dun understand and i have my mood and i wanna go home. sob sob

yeah.....
i just hope i dun suffer from an another asthma attack lilke last nite... :( i am scared...

beth told me to join Ms hong kong...ahahah i laughed at her and told her. i am too short. too skinny and old now..:) anyway. there are so many other pretty gers ard. if i am lucky enough i would have been singing already.. but i know i am not lucky and life goes on...heh heh. seems like i am no longer a dreamer eh.

I am kinda frustrated at school with regards to cantonese as the medium for meeting and they expect me to teach music in cantonesen to the Pri 1. well.....silly them if they give me that , I will try my best but no guarantees.....Evrything is so messy and we are expected to stay till4 though we have nothing to do. so impractical. If i have internet connection , i will spend my time more meaningfully , .....look at stock mkt. ha. so in the end i sat down learning french. such a waste of time.

So many questions.

what is my tt?
my bus duty, the calendar, the lunch duty, Eca? and when is staff meeting....


english and maths no problem.

one more thing is the bus....i walked down the busstop by myself and took 6. I learnt that 76 goes to causeway bay leighton rd/ morrison.

66 and 6 goes to central too. and then i missed my bus stop on the way back cause i cant find the bloody bus stop to stop and press the fucking bell.
but anyway had a good cry when i am back and told myself that either i swim or sink . no one will take pity on me.

well.....and he points at me... menacingly... like he wants to kill you . 2nd time this month. so hurtful. even if there is a miscommunication , i am sure there will be another solution rather than to use such an attitude. :(

i think i am glad you read my blog. go read everything. i din even know what i wrote but when i went back to read it ---i saw that there were also times when i was so upset with you . how come you never read it and talk about it and just harp on kp when it is just a day's entry and OVER? and you start telling me about your principles if made a cuckold? ...just so hurting..

i think you should just go read everything and understand me. you dun understand me enough actually,and i think you know that but you nver want to make an effort to. and now you tell me to be clear.
if i am not clear, why would i be here?

the thing is i hate my sg job , true , but i can still survive in sg giving tuition while suriving there and finding a new one. moving here , takes alot, and i dun even think you know what i am doing.
i am fed up , and i just dont want to convince you anymore. if you think i do care and love you , then so be it. i am so tired of correctin how you feel already. my whole life , just correcting how you feel , how my mom feel and always mis understood.

since when are you treating me gently as a gf? i mean real gentleness. since when you reach over and hug me, to kiss me. and you just feel so proud of taking the initiatives to hold my hands? i feel more like a companion to you! on who eat , talk and sleep with you.

you ask me what i want and be clear.
I TELL YOU STRAIGHT IN THE FACE.---

I LOVE YOU BUT THIS IS NOT WHAT I KNOW I WANT. I NEED YOU TO OPEN UP AND SHOW ME THE LOVE. YOU JUST STORE EVERYTHING AWAY.:( AND I JUST FEEL SO LONELY AND SAD YOU KNOW SOMETIMES. BUT YET , I WANT YOU . SO CAN YOU TELL ME . HOW!

At Macau....







and a double shot in the car.

NiPPon

Here's a collection from my previous 2 Tokyo trips :)

A mixture of my old and current students....Beatrice the sweetie who drew posters for me.Joey who is sooooooooo cute... That's a bespectabled me with Charmaine and Melcia.

Kenna sai... what Macow loot...??!!???!!

I go Macow to work ahhh... not to play...


Im only addicted to winning....!!!

Here are the girls and me .....my lovely 3G :) miss them so much ...

Yay!!! i have another interview....now me no longer a beggar. hehheh. will go for it... sounds like a good school and it is at mid levels. wow wow! ...all girls... and a private school. let's see how much they offer.... if it is higher than rosaryhill, i might switch. :P

Might head to Macau again on saturday depending on him....afraid it might feed his addiction ...but whatever, will stick by rules. no harm for a little swim and massage:)
2 more weeks till opening of school!!!


having curry rice for dinner...yum and him roast goose.
one thing i detest about meat here is that they do not clean the skin of their hairs....so you literally see the hair sticking out of your chicken.....totally disgusting.

dunno if i should open my bank account today to put the macau loot inside..... interest rate is 3 % pretty good huh compare to meagre SG...but i am just so lazy.....have a class at 3. 45 my first touch...then think i will go and get milk and eggs....at park and shop.

Cest la femme....
LONG OVERDUE RENDEVOUS...

HOOKWORM

I HATE HOOKWORM...!!!

SHE ALWAYS HOOKWORM ME....!!!

My V day pressie..... plus a teddy bear which can record voices !!! He recorded a silly message inside.

a flower for me when i stepped into the apartment :)

HUGS ARE IMPORTANT